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« Doctor's Appointment | Main | We've hit a new record...(updated twice in middle) »

August 17, 2007

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Shelby

I completely understand your frustration! I hope the contractions calm down a little and that you make it to 34 weeks. My fingers are crossed for you and the 3 little ones. 1 week down- 6 more to go.

Carol

oh gosh, you're having a hard time. Try to take it easy.I'm not sure why 28 weeks became such a milestone - because you're totally right - not something you want.34 is the goal! you'll make it! try to stay calm.

The Town Criers

As someone who has had premature kids (who were 2 pounds), I can tell you that it's not okay for them to come out right now. What will happen will happen and you'll cross bridges if you must, but keep them cooking.

Erin

It would definitely be FAR better for your little ones to make it as far along as possible, of course. I think others are getting so happy that you're at 28 weeks because they don't think about the realities. They just hear that at 28 weeks, the babies have good chances of surviving. They don't think about the risks to them being born so very early. Survival is a good first milestone. Now let's go for really, really healthy.I just wish the contractions would stop for you. They're scary as hell, and especially when they keep going through medications. I keep hoping and praying those babies will stay in there as long as possible.

Drowned Girl

I understand you perfectly!!Stay babies, stay!

littleangelkisses

I understand your frustration. I had a preemie born at 31 weeks. I had many a person including NURSES tell me to deliver earlier. I refused and pissed them off. Just know that you are absolutely right to be keeping them cooking as long as you can.On a friendly advice note (and you can disregard) try to visit the NICU next time you are at the doctor. Tour, talk to the nurses, look at the babies...prepare yourself. NICU time is difficult when you ARE prepared but if you aren't I think it's such a shock.Part of your frustration lies in that people only think of the "after" stories. So often people will ask about effects of prematurity and people always say "oh, I know XYorZ had her baby early and they are fine" They completely discount the weeks/months that the babies spent in the NICU since eventually years later they are okay. It's not okay to do that. (I'm sorry, I'm rambling but this is close to my heart)Hang in there, you are doing a great job!

Catherine

I don't blame you for being frustrated. You are right - 28 weeks is a huge milestone, but it was never the goal. I know how little the 28 weekers were when my boys were in the NICU and I don't wish that on anyone. 34 weeks (well in my case, 33 weeks and a couple of days) is hard enough because they still had to learn to suck and things like that. Keep doing what you are doing and remember you have a lot of people out here pulling for you!

LCP

You'll make it, I have faith! Just remind these people that if the babies are born early, they won't get to come home until they are satisfied with their health and weight. Why would someone think it is ok to deliver early while they end up in the hospital for a month?

SaraS-P

Hoping you make it way beyond 28 weeks...

Diana

Although I am very happy you have made it to 28 weeks (and beyond) I definitely agree that more is better. I hope your babies get comfy becaue they are in for the long haul!

ms. c

I'm thinking warm and cozy uterine thoughts for your little guys. And peaceful thoughts for you.

Meghan

I'm hoping those babies have learned to listen to their mom already...i'm hoping they're going to sit tight for the next 6 weeks!

Anonymous

The annoyance of that conversation totally comes through. Issues about 28 weeks aside, not only are people not identifying themselves when they call, they are now only stating a NUMBER?I don't understand why anyone would think delivering at 28 weeks would be OKAY. It's more of an after-the-fact thing, that if someone IS delivering very early, well, the chances are good after the milestone of 28 weeks -- good, but not close to 100%, and after a lot of special medical attention.I hope it's okay to have congratulated you on 28 weeks, not as having reached a finish line, but as having made it another week, just as you made it to 27 before and, we hope, to 29 next week.Happy 198th post! It's nice to count weeks and posts whether they are generally considered milestones or not. I hope you and your uterus have a restful Shabbat!

My Reality

First of all, congrats on 28 weeks. When your cervix started shortening a few weeks ago, it was mentioned that they would hopefully get you to 28 weeks. You have done that. I know you don't want the babies to come now. I don't blame you. Yes, they can survive, but your great maternal instincts are in high gear. You are looking out for the best for your children. If anyone can do this, Karen, it is you. 6 more weeks until you reach 34. Your cervix is holding up and your contractions can be managed. Everyday they are in there right now is better for them. You are doing a great job given the stuff you are dealing with. Your children, all 4 of them, are lucky to have a momma who puts them first.

MadtownMom

Whew. I can relate. I've been reading your blog since I discovered it when I was on bedrest. In fact, you had just discovered you were pregnant.Anyways, I only had a singleton pregnancy. I started dilating at 19 weeks and was on strict bedrest until I had her at 38 weeks. Everyone was saying "we want to get you at least until 24 weeks...for viability." And I thought...YOU'RE NUTS. I don't want a 24 weeker. Our first goal was 28 weeks...but soon as we got to 28, our goal was 30, then 32, then 34. I did not relax until I was 34 weeks. I don't think anyone can understand. 90% survival means 10% DON'T! Would they want those kind of statistics for their children. The number is TOO HIGH no matter what it is. I'm with you! Keep holding those babies in as long as you can. Yeah...odds are they'll be fine if they're born now, but odds are a lot better every day they aren't.I'm still thinking of you!

Jessica

I have nothing to say. I do however, as you know, have ears to listen...Love you bunches.

Minnesota Momma

Congratulations on making it to this milestone of 28 weeks, and that's just what it is, a marker to identify a point in time, but not the goal. I hope you make it much, much longer.I would have given almost anything to have 28 weekers or more. Mine ended up coming at 24 weeks, two little one pounders. Their NICU stay would've been so much different if my body hadn't given out. I had a cerclage at 17 weeks due to an incompetent cervix that I found out I had after losing a son at 19 weeks. The cerclage held up well, but, alas, then I developed pre-eclampsia which landed me in the hospital. Little did I know that the goal WAS to get me to 24 weeks. I was way more optimistic and thought I could make it to 28. No dice though. Too sick.But my littles are doing great...almost five now. I can hardly believe it.I have been following your progress, so many similarities in the whole IF journey. I truly wish you the very best and am hoping for several more weeks of lovely bedrest for you!

Jody

28 weeks is nice in the way that conceiving is nice -- it feels great -- but you are so right that it is not the goal. Every day your babies are in the NICU is an agony, and it's not something you get over quickly. So here's hoping, with every fiber of my being, that they can manage these contractions for another 6 weeks and get you to that hallowed 34-week goal.

Casey's trio

I hear your frustration Karen. In all likelihood, the people who think it is okay to deliver at 28 weeks have probably never seen what a 2 pound baby looks like. But I also believe, that their intentions are most likely honorable and they don't mean any offense by the comments.I am really bummed to hear the you are having so many side effects from the terbutaline and that your contractions aren't slowing down. It certainly sounds like you are in good hands with your drs. I am sending you positive thoughts and wishes towards 34 weeks.

Marie-Baguette

Oh Karen, thank you so much for addressing this issue. My singleton was very small but people could not shut up about the fact that at nearly 5 pounds he would be fine and telling me stories about 2 pounder surviving. I wanted a normal healthy baby, why can't people understand this? Everytime I think about seeing my son in the NICU for the first time, I cry. People just don't realize how tough NICU is. I think that the suggestion you go and visit it could be great. Also ask questions about when you can come to visit the babies, what are their policies in terms of having you holding them, feeding them, etc. Where I had my baby there was a "parents room" for mothers to spend the night, but it was really not a nice place. I am really happy the triplets are doing well and I am thinking of you a lot

tipsymarie

That nurse sounds irritating. Yes, 28 weeks is great, longer would be better obviously. And she's a medical professional who should shutup about it already. I just really can't believe her. You are handling all of this really well. I would've lost it on her.

LJ

I am relieved that you hit the milestone, but know how much further you want to and need to be. It has to be overwhelming, I am sure.Good luck with the meds this weekend, keep me posted.

triLcat

I think what some people mean is "at least now you don't have to worry as much about losing them all" (G-d forbid)28 weeks is a great milestone. For me 26 weeks was when I allowed myself to start thinking of the thing inside me as a baby and not just a fetus.of course, it only actually made sense to me that it (she) was a baby when they put her on me.

Jen4 @ Amazing Trips

Actually .. All that REALLY matters is keeping your feet up, drinking lots of water and trying not to stress the rest. The rest is going to happen as it happens, whether you want it to or not. As you know (from reading my Waddle In Time saga) I too, was dead set on our babies making it to a certain "point" and my plans were shot to pot. All you can do is take it one day at a time and savor the quiet, while you've still got it!! Hang in there!!

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